Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
