he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize