I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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