Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
