he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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