I never want to see another naked old woman again.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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