I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
