If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
be right there i have to get my cape
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
