No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
