Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
