Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize