I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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