woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize