i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
