it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
