Just mADE A PArabola og urine
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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