i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize