that's an acceptable place to lick
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
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