he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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