somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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