it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
