Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
