Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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