used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I'm at about main and main street
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
