yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
