you guys were way drunker than both of me
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
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