You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
I need water and some morals
Randomize
