"it" just moved
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
