WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Randomize
