C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
