But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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