There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
either way he was missing a nipple.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
