you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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