Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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