"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
