I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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