i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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