How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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