You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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