didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Randomize
