You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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