I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Randomize
