So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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