hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Randomize
