people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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