i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize