You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Randomize
