dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
