when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
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