im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Randomize
